Confessions of a dangerous mind!

All the events ,places and characters in the story are real. Names of the real characters have been changed for obvious reasons.This story might hurt some people as it is written with that intention,so just bear with the author.

This story concerns two langotiya yaar's Mr Q (as Q comes after P) & Mr E.

before listing out the chain of events I would like to throw some light on 2 main characters involved. Mr Qis a simple, an idiot,jobless,and always confused guy.
Confuse to the state that he thinks for 10 mins before saying anything. I think you can picture what kind of person i m talking abt.

Mr E on the other hand a living proof of **Monbodo theory,a busy guy(BUSY BEING JOBLESS),a cross between Govinda & shahrukh (Chichi for his cheap humour,Hakla
for his all senti shit) , a two time rejected but however sailing his "CHOTI" "PAEDO" catamaran in hoogli river ( i think he is totally inspired by **humbert humbert), but still looking for backup.How insecure can a person be!!!but Mr Q thinks he is true at heart.I think u can picture wat kind of person i m talikng abt.

Now to begin with the story ,it all started on 20th of Feb when Mr Q reached B'lore in hope of finding some peace for his ever confused mind.He had built many Dream castles regarding this trip. But these Dreams were shattered for good the very same day.As Mr Q remeniscences Mr E was the one too comfort him saying "it is good , not for you, not for you"( since thn Mr Q is fighting hard to abrogate all his feelings,but "kya kare yeh dil hai ki manta nahin".),that time Mr Q didnt understand the meaning of these words. but occurences of the last few weeks has forced Mr Q's peanut size brain to procure some information abt Mr E as he was acting a bit weird.And by the analysis of this information,meaning of those words dawned on Mr Q.

Report giving below is based on the information procured by Mr Q from third person , fourth person ( college friend of Mr E).

Important piece of information: A "choti" "paedo" catamaran was sighted sailing from shore to shore in hoogli river , it is reportetd that its sailor has abandoned it, but not yet fully as he returns to it once in a week or so.Not as frequently as it was few weeks back.

below given is the rough schedule of Mr E

Mon -- Fri

1) Looking for the availability of two wheelers for weekend( for courting somebody to dinner), His funda is anything will do the work . Till now used wandi's are as follows :-
i) Activa (his friend's, friend's)
ii) Bike (his friend's, friends's ob not the same one..:))..)
iii) cycle (but didnt get approved , HERO ATLAS with all the frills)

2) Most of the time busy dialing some local no.

3) Rest of the time very busy (being jobless), no time for even coming online and say hi.

Sat

1) Process for getting ready for the dinner starts at 4 He enters bath room at 4 and comes out at 5 ( fourth person describes it as rubbing and scrubbing process but i dont have a clue wat is being rubbed and wat is being scrubbed ??)

2) 5 to 5:30 for getting all dressed up in govinda style.. ( i love it.. white see through lenin shirt
with two buttons from top open, a gold chain hanging )

3) From 6 onwards starts the time of waiting at FORUM ( the most happening mall in blore; food at TRANSIT is great, and chicks plenty,only one prob sutte ki dukan thodi door hai..:((..), I dont have further information about how long he has to wait; (when Mr Q tried to gather info abt this matter third person smiled and droped the topic , fourth person starts laughing his balls out)

Sun

His day starts by standing in a Q for movie tickets ,for two ,for half an hour ( As i said before BUSY BEING JOBLESS) . But hai re Mr E ki kismet it turns out he alone has to see the movie... how bad it can be :((..Mr Q ki sympathy is with Mr E.


I dont have any clue wat u guys ( people reading the story ;)) will gather from the information above ( i have special request for our consultant frnd Mr B to analyse the situation),but Mr Q did conclude somethings ( keep in mind the confused state of his mind his judgement can be prejudiced).
Mr Q has somethings to say to Mr E " Arey yaar fight mar raha hai tho atleast tell udp junta , dont be such a coy it doesnot suit you ,arey boss NOBODY IS GONNA SLAP YOU FOR THIS"

By now you can imagine how confused this fu***** idiot is i meant Mr Q is. At last Mr Q want me to end the story in this way..

** Eh tu D****!!!!!
four words from Mr Q to Mr E " U BETTER PATCH UP "

PS 1) All the criticism is welcome, but plzzz restrain from using expletives, i really dont like
them. And plzz no justification and storys.
**2) For lesser mortals like people with name Bhindi i can understand the limitation of your mortal, puerile mind.So feel free to ask me abt terms which u dont understand to get the full jocoseness of the story.
3) NO HARD FEELINGS!!!!
Some one may find some of the patterns i mean events simililar to his case he should feel free to speak ,because i think the one is laughing . yaar u can share ur feelings too . but again no hard feelings.
4) for any grammatical mistakes plzz bear with me.

FOR INTERNAL USE ONLY ( internal bole tho inside udaipurlangots :)) ..)

ISSUED IN THE INTEREST OF Mr E.


-- first published on udaipurlangots on Sept 17th, 2005.

Random out-of-context quotes!

You were not put on this earth just to get in touch with God. That sort of thing coul sap all the strength and the goodness out of a chelloveck.

But,brothers,this biting of their toe-nails over the what is the cause of the badness is what turns me into fine laughing malchick. They don't go into the cause of goodness, so why other shop? If lewdies are good that's because they like it ,and i wouldn't interfere with their pleasures, an so with the other shop.And I was patronizing the other shop. More,badness is of the self,the one,the you and me on our oddy knockies,and that self is made by the old Bog or God and is his great pride and radosty. But the not-self cannot have the bad,meaning they of the governments and the judges and the school cannot allow the bad because they cannot allow the self. An is not our modern history,my brothers ,the story of brave malenky selves fighting these big machines?I am serious with you brothers ,over this. But what I do I do because I like to do.

And I made with a like deep bow,smiling like beezoomny but thinking all the time. But when we got into the street I viddied that thinking is for the gloopy ones an that the oomny ones use like inspiration and what Bog sends.

-- Anthony Burgess ( A Clockwork Orange)

My name is KKKhan!!

My name is Karan Johar
I am not a good movie director (I am just bigger version of Ekta Kapoor)

My name is Khan
I am not an good actor ( I am a star! and Damn good business man)

My name is D
I am not a movie critic!

I liked the Movie in bits and pieces, though if I count bits and pieces they would amount to in total 15-20! I guess. These bits are all the funny dialogues, scattered through out the movie, and the pieces are the thought provoking and heart touching dialogues. Pieces also include the fabulous acting of Kajol and of the kid played the part of Sam.

Though I know its a crime to do a critical review( in terms of consistency and eye for detail) of Bollywood movie but I can't stop myself from doing this crime. I think its Ok to use name of a (Asperger's) disorder to an extent a character can play it consistently across the movie.

Khan played the part beautifully ( he does invoke a feeling of pity, though on second thoughts he always does that in all his movies starting from Darr,Bazigar,KHNH,DTPH,KANK etc.etc..) his actions and movements were consistent across the movie. But I'll find the fault with Director when he asked the character of Rizwan to cry in the end though it is claimed in the middle somewhere that Rizwan can't cry( as a result of his autism).

Director did a bad job at imitation & of plagiarism of some scenes from Forest Gump & Beautiful Mind!

Some more of research was needed in depicting Aspergers patient but I can accommodate with that.As a movie is a work of fiction but what I can't accommodate with is the lack of consistency, which is director's fault.Other example- Khan holding the yellow board ( though it can be mistake in print as well :p)

Autist's are not good at social interaction and I think they aren't good at symbolism as well. One example of symbolism is the "seene ka dard",which stops when Rizwan sees Mandira outside the prison. But I guess I am Ok with it as at some point director did clarify that due to Rizwan's mom's continuous care he is better off then others, with same syndrome. But I am afraid that it might be just by accident.

Narration could have been much better!

Apart from all "this" movie was good one time watch!

PS: - I think Khan has a knack of abusing emotions to such an extent that you can't call it even exaggeration! and I guess this ability of his makes him a Star, a heart throb or whatever!Mind you I admire Khan! but for reasons other than acting!

I hate all the actors nowadays as they use cheap marketing stunts, like being part of some political issue just before the release of their movies! I am against this propaganda! But again I think they are into business of Movie making not the Art! So I am Ok!.

But if they claim that their movies are work of art and still use such cheap marketing stunts then they are the "doosre" type ke insaan! Bure insaan!

The problem lies with the notion in my head that artists should be on some kind of higher moral ground then others around them( But I guess Anthony Burgess for sure won't agree with me on this)! This notion of mine goes for Scientists, Doctors! but of course not for present day Engineers! :P

Road less traveled!

I guess by "Road less traveled" what is implied is that don't decide on not taking a route because many say its not possible, or it's against the society, or whoever went there got mugged..

But of course the inner conviction( which again is present, but its the turmoil over that decision,the realm of right-thing-to-do and wrong-thing-to-do is a illusion by conscience, rising out of maybe the inherent feeling of grandeur future,or maybe something else )
is a pre-requisite before you march on..

Dream on!

you have traveled across the world,but if you cant accept a perspective other than yours
you have not seen the world!

you have opinion about every thing,but if you don't know that other opinions do rightfully exist
you have not felt the world!

you achieve your goal but if you believe that your way is the only way to achieve one's goal
you are not worldly wise

you know what to do but if you don't know why
you are in a Dream! enjoy it!

Nayan Tarse!

I saw you and kept seeing you...
I guess I was waiting for approval
I was waiting to get recognized
I was waiting for just a glance

Then I kept seeing you through corner of my eyes
waiting to catch you stealing a glance, but it never came

Now I wait to see you once again..
Now I wait to feel your laugh..
Now I wait to hear silence..

I am falling to new Heights!
I KKnow it will be like This always! I do.